Q. How do Biblical scholars know that King David rode a motorcycle?
A. Because in the Bible, it says that David's Triumph could be heard throughout the land...

Q: What do you call a group of Harley Owners with a collective IQ of 120?
A: Sturgis!

Q: How is a Harley Davidson like a Porcupine?
A: Both have pricks on their back.

Q: How is a Harley Davidson like an old dog?
A: If you leave them alone long enough, they'll both mark their territory.

Q: What is the difference between a Harley Davidson and an old dog?
A: The dog can get in the back of the pickup by itself.

Q: Why do Harley owners have tassels on their handlebars and clothing?
A: To be able to tell if they're moving or not !

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Slow Down or Stop?    The police officer had just pulled over a yuppie on a new Harley for running a stop sign.  "May I see your driver's license and registration please..." the officer asked.

"What's the problem, officer?" the yuppie replied.

"You just ran a stop sign." the officer said.

"Oh come on, pal, there wasn't a single car anywhere in sight."

"Nevertheless sir, you are required to come to a complete stop, look both ways, and only then proceed with caution."

"You've got to be kidding me!" the yuppie said.

"It's no joke sir." the officer said flatly, pulling out his citation book and preparing to write a ticket.

"Look I slowed down almost to a complete stop, saw no one, and proceeded with caution."

The officer sighed and slowly shook his head.  "That's beside the point sir, you are supposed to come to a complete stop and you didn't. Now if I may see your license and..." the officer began.

"You sure do have a lot of time on your hands pal. What's the matter, all the doughnut shops closed this early?" the yuppie asked sneering.

"SIR!" The officer sighed. "I'll over look that last comment now let me see your license and registration immediately!"

"I will, if you can tell me the difference between slowing down, and coming to a complete stop." the yuppie said, folding his arms across his chest.

A smile appeared on the officer's face. "Sir, I can do better than that."  The police officer quickly jerked the rude yuppie off his Harley, and proceeded to methodically beat him over the head with his nightstick.  "Now sir, would you like for me to slow down or come to a complete stop?"

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Old Dirtbiker Joke: An 80 year old man went to the doctor for a check-up and the doctor was amazed at what good shape the guy was in. The doctor asked, "To what do you attribute your good health?"

The old timer said, "I'm a dirt biker and that's why I'm in such good shape. I'm up well before daylight on
Sundays and out sliding around corners, "shootin" sand washes and riding up and down the steepest, gnarliest
hills I can find at the crack of dawn."

The doctor said, "Well, I'm sure that helps, but there's got to be more to it. How old was your dad when he died?" The old timer said, "Who said my dad's dead?"

The doctor said, "You mean you're 80 years old and your dad's still alive? How old is he?"

The old timer said, "He's 99 years old and, in fact, he went riding with me this Sunday, and that's why he's
still alive... he's a dirt biker."

The doctor said, "Well, that's great, but I'm sure there's more to it. How about your dad's dad? How old was he when he died?"

The old timer said, "Who said my grandpa's dead?"

The doctor said, "You mean you're 80 years old and your grandfather's still living! How old is he?"

The old timer said, "He's 117 years old."

The doctor was getting frustrated at this point and said, "I guess he went dirt bikin' with you this Sunday too?"

The old timer said, "No... Grandpa couldn't go this week because he got married."

The Doctor said in amazement, "Got married!! Good Lord!!! Why would a 117-year-old guy want to get married?"

The old timer said, "Who said he wanted to?"